Dreams

So you know everyone needs to have dreams. Well I have some, but I avoid trying to even consider reaching them. Well yesterday I was thinking of some past dreams that I have had. And I realized there are a few that I still really want to make happen, but not sure how to make it happen.
One is drama... no not like the teenage girl life is horrible drama, but like the acting type of drama... I always loved doing that, and I was in this thing at Elmbrook that we put on skits and performances for a bunch of things. It was one of the most fun things I have ever done. I never wanted to give it up, but I hit the point of I was to old to be in that thing, and we also started to attend FRCC. Well I have tried to pursue doing Kidftuf drama, and I have tried to talk to someone about it a few times, and they have not really given me the time or day for it. I get it, I'm not one of the cool people around, but still, I have wanted to do it since I have been around FRCC, and since I have known about Kidstuf. But yeah... I'm not sure how to pursue this dream. I don't even know how good at it I am or ever was. So is it worth trying to pursue?

Another one that has never gone away, I just got down on myself for, and a couple other reasons, but its photography. I love it, I love capturing a moment, I love using the little bit of creativity that I have. I know for the most part how to pursue this one. It's just a matter of getting there, and working on it.

And then there is the oh so typical dream of getting married and having kids. Cause really it is my biggest dream of all. That one is just a matter of waiting for God's timing.

It has been a long time since I have thought about my dreams. I have such a fear of failure, and letting others and myself down that I gave up on thinking about them, or even continuing to dream. It's not something that anyone should do. How does someone become so hurt/discouraged to not even dream? Oh wait I know (kinda)...
But yeah, I am really working on God centered, confirmed words/thoughts.