About Me
- Bethann
- Life has it's highs and lows. Embrace it. Live It. Push through. Find the Joy, the Laughter, the Smiles. The little things are the things that bring the most joy. New Life Rises From The Ashes. ~ <3 ~
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Who Am I
OK this is one thing that I have always wondered, and will probably always wonder and ask. But "Who Am I"
I know I have a lot of things about me. But I just haven't found that notch in life.
I have always struggled with who I am. I have always been on and off of liking myself. And lately I have been hating myself. I noticed this today. I don't know what it is. I feel like I am bad at being me, and bad at the things in my life.
When it comes to my friends, I have a wide variety. I know who my best friends are, but I wonder, am I one of their best friends? Am I anyones best friend? Or am I just another friend to everyone.
I wonder if I make a difference to anyone. What is something I have done that has made an impact to someone, anyone.
What does my life mean? THere have been a few recent moments where I have almost come close to being in an accident that I could have been dead. Makes me think, why didn't it happen what is my purpose? Why do I exist? But I feel so lost and struggling with who I am that I have been scared.
Part of me knows its Satan, but really... Who Am I? What do I mean to anyone? What is my purpose?
I know I have a lot of things about me. But I just haven't found that notch in life.
I have always struggled with who I am. I have always been on and off of liking myself. And lately I have been hating myself. I noticed this today. I don't know what it is. I feel like I am bad at being me, and bad at the things in my life.
When it comes to my friends, I have a wide variety. I know who my best friends are, but I wonder, am I one of their best friends? Am I anyones best friend? Or am I just another friend to everyone.
I wonder if I make a difference to anyone. What is something I have done that has made an impact to someone, anyone.
What does my life mean? THere have been a few recent moments where I have almost come close to being in an accident that I could have been dead. Makes me think, why didn't it happen what is my purpose? Why do I exist? But I feel so lost and struggling with who I am that I have been scared.
Part of me knows its Satan, but really... Who Am I? What do I mean to anyone? What is my purpose?
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
What I am Learning
So in Nicaragua and since I have been back, God ha been teaching me a lot. Mostly things like loving Him fully, loving His people, to be more joyful in everything, trying not to complain about thing, and much more. I learned so much and had the greatest time in Nicaragua (more then I ever had in Poland.) Since I have been back I have been reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan. Oh my goodness it is one of the greatest books I have ever read. Just in the first few chapters God was teaching me. I can eve n tell there is a difference in me, a difference that I want to keep growing in.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Oh the Joys...
Its funny how God uses the people in your life.
This is my "challenge" that I had last night....
SO there is a boy I like (I know, Im such a teenage girl) and we have been friends for years now. I have liked him on and off for most of our friendship. Well when I found out he was going to Nicaragua with the team I was stoke (again teenage girl lol.) I wasn't going to do anything about the fact that I like him, cause thats just weird, and I didn't want weird while on the trip or anytime for that matter.
On the day we were coming home (well were were in Chicago at this point now) we stopped and got some food. Well this boy and I went over to go get coffee. And we started to talk, and he brought up how he likes another girl that was on the trip, but wasn't sure if he should do something about it or if it would be weird since there a bit of an age gap. All while I am being a supportive friend and talking to him about it, and I am thinking man, I like you, this sucks to hear.
Well then again last night we were talking on FB about the same thing. And he said sorry for putting this all on you, and also said that I am one of the few people he can talk to about things. Well that hit me hard. I care so much about him, that I am willing to put my feelings aside, and let him talk to me about things like a girl he likes. He is one of my best friends, and I don't think I have ever seen that until this happened. I have always looked to him as a boy I like. But there is so much more then that. I care about him, and I would do anything for him. I will always be there, and with God's grace and help, willing to put aside my feelings. Cause its not about me.
I want to be the best friend I can be to him and to all of my friends.
This is my "challenge" that I had last night....
SO there is a boy I like (I know, Im such a teenage girl) and we have been friends for years now. I have liked him on and off for most of our friendship. Well when I found out he was going to Nicaragua with the team I was stoke (again teenage girl lol.) I wasn't going to do anything about the fact that I like him, cause thats just weird, and I didn't want weird while on the trip or anytime for that matter.
On the day we were coming home (well were were in Chicago at this point now) we stopped and got some food. Well this boy and I went over to go get coffee. And we started to talk, and he brought up how he likes another girl that was on the trip, but wasn't sure if he should do something about it or if it would be weird since there a bit of an age gap. All while I am being a supportive friend and talking to him about it, and I am thinking man, I like you, this sucks to hear.
Well then again last night we were talking on FB about the same thing. And he said sorry for putting this all on you, and also said that I am one of the few people he can talk to about things. Well that hit me hard. I care so much about him, that I am willing to put my feelings aside, and let him talk to me about things like a girl he likes. He is one of my best friends, and I don't think I have ever seen that until this happened. I have always looked to him as a boy I like. But there is so much more then that. I care about him, and I would do anything for him. I will always be there, and with God's grace and help, willing to put aside my feelings. Cause its not about me.
I want to be the best friend I can be to him and to all of my friends.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
IM BACK!!!!!!!!!!
I had the greatest time of my life.
I plan on blogging more about it. But right now I cant think. So more to come in the next week.
God is great, and Im glad I had the chance to go
I plan on blogging more about it. But right now I cant think. So more to come in the next week.
God is great, and Im glad I had the chance to go
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Nicaragua
YAY I am less then 24hrs away from leaving.
As I was driving home from church today I was listening to klove for the first time in a while. Two songs cam on and totally hit home to what this missions trip is about.
First one was Follow You by Leeland. Which has become the "theme" song for this trip. Our journal that Tracy put together has that theme, and it is such a cool way to look at what we are going to for Christ.
The second song was The Power of Your Name by Lincoln Brewster. This song in hearing it today, made me cry. It really put my focus in check, and I am so excited to be going and having this chance to be used in this way to go and make a difference in God's kingdom.
As I was driving home from church today I was listening to klove for the first time in a while. Two songs cam on and totally hit home to what this missions trip is about.
First one was Follow You by Leeland. Which has become the "theme" song for this trip. Our journal that Tracy put together has that theme, and it is such a cool way to look at what we are going to for Christ.
The second song was The Power of Your Name by Lincoln Brewster. This song in hearing it today, made me cry. It really put my focus in check, and I am so excited to be going and having this chance to be used in this way to go and make a difference in God's kingdom.
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